You know one thing I always say to people about self-care is that it’s different for everyone. There is no 3-step process to getting better by using self-care. It’s a long, often slow process to firstly figure out some ideas about what you could do that would make you feel happy (or cared for), then doing it and along the way destroying your unhelpful beliefs that you are not valued and therefore not worthy of being cared for – by yourself or by others.
So my encouragement to you this week is to get creative and make your own self-care list! It might even be something you do with friends or your family and get everyone to make their own and share their ideas.
What are the things that you like doing that maybe you don’t do often enough or at all anymore, what are the things that you love doing and do often and what are the things that you used to love as a kid, that you could start doing again now?
Most of us stop playing at the age of about 8 or 9 when our comparison barometer kicks in and as we get older and busier it just gets less and less. Start by making a list so that when you want to spend some time caring for yourself, you don’t have to think about what to do but you can simply go to your list and choose something.
EXTRA TIP – Make sure you have things on your list that are things you can do:
- at home – i.e reading a book
- out of the home – i.e. going for a walk in a picturesque place
- if it’s raining – i.e. have a coffee at your favourite coffee shop
- if it’s sunny – i.e a walk in nature or hit of golf
- that costs money – i.e a trip to the movies or a special show or game you’ve been wanting to see
- for free – i.e. read a book in the sun, take a bath or set a boundary with someone
- on your own – i.e. take a nap or do some journalling
- with others – i.e. have a games night with friends or ask for help
Share your Self-Care list with a friend, colleague or family member. And don’t be afraid to steal other people’s ideas – sharing is caring and it’s OK to do that! 😉 It’s a great way to get started when you are just learning. Here’s mine 🙂
Next thing to do is to stick it somewhere in your house that will remind you to choose you and value yourself. It might be on the fridge, next to your desk, in the laundry – wherever you find yourself struggling with the day to day challenges.
Last thing is to make time for it in your diary. Start with one thing a week and work towards one thing a day that will help you to choose you.
You matter and you make the world a better place.
Take Care on the Journey!